For most adults, sex is a natural activity that can bring joy, frustration, contentment or disappointment – inspiring the full range of human responses. But for some women the very thought of sexual contact with another human being causes such anxiety that they can never get close to the act.
I see clients from many different backgrounds and for many different reasons, some women who come to see me have never experienced sexual intimacy whilst others have experienced past difficulties and as a result have negative connotations around sex or have physiological problems.
I offer Tantric-Tao Bodywork Sessions that are designed to release negative and stagnant emotions from the body and can help a woman to explore their sexuality and overcome sexual problems.
Sessions are tailored to the needs of a client, so a first session might be as simple as getting comfortable with being in a room with a man; whilst for a client that is comfortable with touching and nudity a full session that involves yoni massage may be appropriate. The sessions are discussed before they commence, and all boundaries and treatment aims are set.
The sessions for a client can be challenging, sometimes engaging, arousing, emotional and some clients experience shame and physical discomfort, whilst others will feel excitement and confidence. I would liken the sensations felt in a session to being like a wave, where feelings and sensations come and go and you feel many things.
I work with clients both sexually, physically and emotionally and I have supported many women through very challenging and sometimes life-changing processes.
I feel a session is to be entered into with as much self-awareness as a client can gather and I try to assist each client to make an informed decision about a session at the time of booking and during the pre-session consultation.
A session begins with a consultation. This is where we decide our intention and formulate a session plan i.e. we agree what we’re going to explore and what the boundaries are within that session. The intention of the session varies from client to client and is all based upon your needs, desires and comfort zones.
This element of the session will last for a minimum of one hour
Not only will we discuss your reasons for coming for a session and anything you want to discuss that will help to define the session aims and sets boundaries but we will also:
- Discuss the treatment card and consent form you have signed
We will take time to look over the online consent form you have signed in order to make sure everything is clear, that you understand everything and that you are happy to still give consent.
- Look features and benefits of the session
I will explain all the features and benefits of the treatment session and I will answer any questions you may have so you can make an informed decision about whether to have a session . We will look at all aspects of the treatment plan and will examine all the pro’s and cons of treatment. I will also discuss alternative options you may have and self-help in between sessions
- Explain how you may feel during and after the session
It is important that you understand how you may feel during and after a session and that you know what support is available to you and how to access it.
We will discuss how best to process any emotions and symptoms that surface post-treatment and I will provide you with details of what support is available to you and what you can do if you encounter any difficult emotions / feelings after the session.
- Setting goals and Managing Expectations
We will discuss what you would like to achieve during and after sessions. This is a very important step as this will help you understand what can realistically be achieved in a session and will help me understand what you want to gain from a session.
- To establish what your hopes and fears are
We will discuss what your hopes and fears are at this moment in time and for the future. This will help us to define your sessions and set boundaries.
- To establish what your boundaries are
We will discuss boundaries during the sessions and will establish what your boundaries are and what mine as a therapist are. Establishing boundaries is an important element in making sure that I can deliver a session that meets your expectations as a client and that the session is conducted to the best of my ability as a professional.
Furthermore, boundaries delineate personal and professional roles and boundaries are essential to client and therapist safety.
By establishing what your boundaries are and setting boundaries I can ensure that your needs are being met in this relationship.
We will also discuss how to withdraw your consent at any time during the session.
- To create a safe, sacred, supportive and trusting environment
Throughout therapy sessions I aim to create a safe, sacred and supportive environment of trust where I can hold the space as difficult or traumatic emotions are released or as you explore vulnerable emotions.
- Steam Shower & Quiet Reflection Time
You will be invited to take a steam shower before the next stage of the session begins. This is a good opportunity for you to enjoy some quiet time, relax and contemplate everything we have discussed during the consultation.
Connection Rituals & Exercises
We will spend some time doing some exercises to connect more deeply with ourselves, and each and this is important preparation for the session.
The first of these exercises will be done by you, the client, whilst guided by me
This is facilitated to switch off the thinking mind and get in touch with her body to feel and disperse stagnant emotions from the body cellular memory by shaking the body
- use of body movement (trance dance to music)
- use of breath work
- use of sounds
- To contract and relax, stretch and open the body
- Pelvic flow exercises incorporating breath
- Bringing awareness to the pelvic
- This is to bring awareness to the pelvic area and become aware of your own inner sexual energy without touch
- To be awakened
Soul and heart connection rituals using the 5 sensors
Trauma can happen only through one or more of the five sensors (touch, vision, hearing, smell or taste), either as a giver or as a receiver. By exploring these gateways with consciousness, love and respect with sensitivity, you can feel and disperse negative emotions with breath and sharing.
These gentle tantric exercises will help you, the client, to drop your mask and armouring and be vulnerable and exposed in a safe, sacred space to be in touch with your deep roots of negative emotions in the body, enabling you to reconnect to the body and regain a sense of control within. You will be completely in control of this element of the session and whilst the aim of this exercise is to expand the ‘window of tolerance’ you can decide what pace to work at and set your own limits.
Now we will move onto the main body of the session and explore the things we discussed during the consultation.
Throughout this session I use my years of experience to hold the space and will facilitate the session as discussed during the consultation
This is a body-based approach and includes many holistic modalities including Tantra and Taoist teachings and bodywork techniques.
- Bodywork starts with you, the client lying down on the massage mat either fully, partially clothed or without clothes. This is totally your decision.
- You will be given the options to receive any one or more of the 5 sensors on your body. You will now be given the opportunity to let me know which part of the body you desire to be worked on and with what level of pressure, i.e. deep pressure, gentle or feathering and whether you would like oil to be applied to that area.
- I will do exactly what you ask me to do for 1 min at a time for the first 10 minutes of the session.
- In the next 10 minutes of the session I will do whatever touch is required for 2 minutes at a time. This process will continue with the treatment duration increasing one minute at a time every 10 minutes.
- After 1 minute I will pause until you give me the next instruction.
You will be completely in control of the session and you will find this element of the session empowering. I will not do anything until you tell me to. Sometimes I may refrain from any treatment for 10 – 20 mins whilst awaiting your next instruction as this may be the time, you need to process. I will hold the space for you whilst you release, process or access any past negative events.
- You will be the guide in this session, I will merely hold the space for you and will use techniques to help you achieve your goals in the therapy session. You will be given help, support and a safe space to release, to process and integrate your trauma and will be supported to reach self-regulation.
- The yoni massage only happens after treatment of the rest of the body. The yoni massage is not offered as a stand-alone treatment and the yoni massage is something that you do not have to opt to experience, but it is something many of my clients wish to experience.
- A yoni massage will only be performed if you have opted to receive a yoni massage during consultation and have signed the relevant consent forms.
- Even if you have opted to receive a yoni massage and signed consent forms at the start of the session, verbal consent will be sought from you again prior to the massage commencement.
- This is a massage of the genital area of the body and will involve me performing a include me massaging your genital area, and this can cover both external and internal massage points. A yoni massage may be therapeutic, focused on locating and releasing tension stored deep within the abdomen, or sensual, focused on helping you to feel sexual pleasure, reconnect with and understand your sexual response and achieve orgasm and female ejaculation.
To learn more about a yoni massage click here
Closure, Feedback & Sharing
The session is brought to a close in a relaxed way so that the woman feels energetic and harmonious.
Once the bodywork element of the session has come to an end then we will take time for feedback and sharing.